Well hello there everyone! Did you miss me? I can’t believe it’s been so long since I last wrote. It’s been a hectic few months, there have been some good times, some amazing times and some really fucking awful times! Suffice to say, throughout most of these times, Slimming World has been at the back of my mind and as a result I have regained just under 4 stone. Not the proudest moment of my life but I’m not going to beat myself up over it. I suppose I should explain, and I hope that doing so will act as something as a purge.
So starting with the amazing, I got married 🙂 I am now officially a wife and have a shiny new ring on my finger! It was amazing, and on the run up to it I couldn’t decide if I wanted to binge eat everything in sight out of stress or starve myself. It was not a good time for me and Fat Club, but I loved my dress, I felt stunning in it and I’m hopeful that now I don’t have my wedding looming over me, I can just take Slimming World easy rather than stressing and obsessing.
I refused to obey any rules of Slimming World while on honeymoon. Every day at breakfast, I had a full English. For lunch, I either had some local food if we were out or something nice and hot from the buffet. Dinner consisted of 3 courses and a cheeseboard. Not only did I eat like I’d never seen food before, I drank sooooo much alcohol. There were cocktails every day, wine with dinner and dessert wine with pud. However, thanks to all my hard work, I didn’t need a seat belt extender on the plane going there or back. I’d chalk that up as a win!
I’m losing my job. I found out in October 2015, and my final day is 1st March 2017. From April last year, I spend alot of time going to Warrington in order to train the new starters up there. Every night was a case of going out for dinner and drinking beer. Every. Single. Night. My boss (who has since been made redundant), actually said that he viewed these trips up North as “like a stag do but not”. I think that probably gives you an idea of the way they went down. My favourite night was at a club called Shenanigans. Utter shithole… It was absolutely amazing!
So, the title kind of says it all. I found out I was pregnant at the start of November, then miscarried at the end of November. As miscarriages go, I suppose I was quite lucky. It wasn’t especially painful, and the very nice sonographer told me there was absolutely no sign of a baby at all – so I’ve been looking at this as though I didn’t really lose anything. Don’t get me wrong, I cried a lot. I was very sad, and I still am. Family day at work was particularly hard, there were so many kids running around and all I did was wonder whether I’d ever be able to have one of my own. The thing is, I have PCOS, so getting pregnant at all is a minor miracle, and this would have been our honeymoon baby. We will never have another chance to make a honeymoon baby, and in some ways I found that very hard to get over. I felt like it with the timing, this was meant to be – apparently not. How does this relate to Slimming World? Well. For 2 weeks solid, I comfort ate. Every dinner was either takeaway or takeaway leftovers – breakfast and lunch ranged from Mr Kiplings Angel slices to a large pack of Doritoes with sour cream dip. I don’t feel bad for any of it though – there are some situations where you just do what you gotta do.
So there we go! I plucked up the courage to stand on the scales for the first time in months last Monday, and spent last week getting used to Fat Club again. I wasn’t particularly strict with it, but I tried getting back into the habit of planning a meal, cooking my soup and dinner throughout the work and snacking on fruit rather than chocolate. I even tried my hand at making hummus. I think that overall I did really well! This week I’m actually making a concerted effort to stick to the plan, but the joy of having the wedding over is that I no longer have anything to slim for but myself. I hope this lack of pressure will make a real difference. I’m also going to make a more concerted effort with my blog and actually post regularly and on time! I know that really, nobody probably reads this and I am essentially talking to myself, but I think this will also help me stay on track!